What Are Grounds for Divorce in North Carolina (and Is That Even the Right Question)?

If you are thinking about ending your marriage, you might have searched for the “grounds for divorce in North Carolina.” However, that isn’t quite the right framework for what you may be looking for.

Unlike some states, divorce in North Carolina does not require most couples to prove specific grounds or wrongdoing. Instead, North Carolina is generally considered a no-fault divorce state, meaning that an absolute divorce is based primarily on a period of separation and not on proving that one spouse caused the marriage to fail.

However, that doesn’t mean the reasons for a separation are not important. Many people separate because of issues that affect their marriage, finances, or family life. Some of those circumstances may influence other aspects of a divorce case, such as alimony or child custody, even if they aren’t “grounds” for divorce itself.

Most people think of the “divorce” as including all the issues that result from the separation: child custody, child support, alimony, and equitable distribution (property division). These are the real substantive claims that couples face in a separation. However, these claims are separate from the divorce claim. You can resolve the substantive claims without having to wait for the one-year period of separation.

Here’s what you should know if you are trying to decide whether you’re ready for separation, what legal requirements apply, and what steps they should take before filing for divorce.

Every marriage is different, but some situations appear more frequently than others.

Communication Problems

Many marriages deteriorate because communication gradually breaks down. Small disagreements become larger conflicts, and eventually spouses find themselves unable to resolve problems constructively.

Poor communication alone is not a legal requirement for separation, but it is one of the most common reasons couples decide to live apart.

Financial Stress

Money is another major source of marital conflict. Disagreements may involve:

• Spending habits
• Debt
• Retirement planning
• Employment changes
• Financial secrecy

Financial problems can place enormous strain on a marriage and may ultimately lead one or both spouses to decide that separation is the healthiest option.

Infidelity

One of the most frequently asked questions family law attorneys receive is: “Can I divorce my spouse immediately because they cheated?”

The answer is generally no.

Although adultery can be emotionally devastating and may influence issues like alimony, it does not eliminate North Carolina’s one-year separation requirement for obtaining an absolute divorce.

That said, infidelity may still become an important issue in other parts of the divorce process.

Domestic Violence

Domestic violence presents a very different situation.

If your safety or your children’s safety is at risk, you should not remain in an unsafe environment simply because North Carolina requires one year of separation before divorce.

Victims of domestic violence may have legal options that include:

• Domestic Violence Protective Orders (DVPOs)
• Emergency custody requests
• Temporary possession of the marital home

Protecting your safety should always come first.

Substance Abuse

Alcohol or drug addiction can place tremendous stress on a marriage. Substance abuse may affect:

• Parenting ability
• Employment
• Household finances
• Emotional well-being
• Physical safety

Although addiction itself is not a separate legal ground for divorce, it may become relevant in custody decisions if it affects a child’s best interests.

Simply Growing Apart

Not every marriage ends because of dramatic misconduct. Sometimes spouses simply reach a point where they realize they no longer want to remain married.

North Carolina’s no-fault divorce laws recognize that marriages sometimes end without either spouse being legally “at fault.”